Ready to Cross the (Grad School) Finish Line

As I prepare to start my grad program's capstone course, I realize that the writing I expected to do here on my blog throughout the duration of this experience certainly has not come to fruition. Best laid plans, right?!

Time has flown by, and it’s odd to think this journey is coming to an end, but I’m also grateful; I’ve poured myself into the work and study that a full-time master’s degree requires, and quite honestly, I’m exhausted. I’d hoped to continue and get my Ph.D., but that wasn’t meant to be at this time, and I think my body has responded by letting me know, “It‘s OK - we need rest.”

So I’m concentrating on finishing the last of my program and searching for the next step. That could be coaching in any number of capacities, but one thing I know for sure is I’m committing more time to myself, for myself. Recently I was diagnosed with ADHD, depression, and anxiety - all of which I have felt on an absolutely massive scale over the last year, year and a half. I’m fortunate (stick with me here!) in that my wife was diagnosed with chronic depression soon after she graduated high school and then ADHD and anxiety not long after that, so she has been an awesome source of support and understanding. This is relevant because recently, I shared with her about how I was feeling - realizing that I’ve been unable to articulate in my own words my own experiences, beliefs, and understandings; that what I have experienced and tried to convey to others has really been a normative narrative I thought was the only way to articulate because that's what I’d seen and been shown most of my life.

I’m taking ownership of my experiences, putting words I believe in to share and express myself to help me feel and be comfortable in my mind and body - and it’s gonna take time, work, and energy, but my wife reassures me it will be worth it. And from what I’ve seen from her journey over the last year and a half recovering from burnout and toxic work environments, it will be challenging, but I look forward to being in that place with her. She's also reassured me that I've already started the process of not only learning but healing, and although it's been hard, it will get better.

So that’s part of why I’m here, I guess - back here - it’s important for me to share this now with not only my family, friends, and community but with anyone who feels alone, lost, and anxious; we keep going because we can. And I look forward to continuing to share the journey ahead.

There are also some experiences from the last few years that I'm looking forward to expanding upon here, like being the Race Announcer for UltraMan Arizona 2023 in March, as you can see from the pic above. It's definitely been a busy time, but we've made sure to have fun too!